please grant me more patience

The pain in my head increases, the hormones are running up and down and here n there, seems like the world is upside  down, and gravity is running away ,and am rotating with the earth , tears and words running out of me, blood is rushing in me, everything is going against my wishes , and suddenly, all goes normal, seems i was in some roller coaster ride for few seconds. 

This happens when am all tried after all the work and finally out of a relaxed bath, and I see a big mess in the place , where I had just cleaned and left . 

I don’t know whom to blame and I tend to blame everyone , finally cleaning it up all on my own , and giving up shouting at everyone. I hate rework ,a and for past few years, thats what am doing every now and then . This year with my lil naughty one around,  its like double work for me , my elder one and their dad. 

Nothing is set right, the house is always upside down , nothing is in its proper place, nothing is beautiful , nothing is perfect. From morning till night , My bones are always in a up and down motion , as I have to keep picking things , and keep it safe up , else , keep picking up my daughter , as she keeps falling or doing some mischief. 

But in the end, when she is off to sleep, I look at her lovely innocent face, and feel relaxed, atleast she is happy . The way she holds on to me, and looks into my eyes and says her silent whisper ,that she loves me, all my tiredness vanishes into thin air , and leave me in the guilt of being angry and at times too bad to them. 

I wish that suit too vanish into thin air as my tiredness. 😉

morning blues

Vacation over, my marathon starts.

These ten days was quite relaxing, along with my kids, i too became too lazy , with my household. So yesterday night , shining about the coming week , I was damn tired to even think about it. The thought of me running around waking up everyone ,making all my breakfast n lunch and packing up all to school and office , it was all like a a movie am watching with the fast forward button on.

May be because of that , I woke  up quite early and that too at 5 in the morning , and then as usual , reading my friends blog that too early morning in my mobile. ( I guess am mad ) . I was reading  her blog ,she has 4 kids so , she will be more tiring than me ,her blog inspired me, atleast I just have to deal with two kids and their dad. 😉 Feeling better.

As I was about to get out of the bed, my lil one woke up , and then i walked around with her , once she was  relaxed i put her to bed , then even though the bed inspired me to sleep then , but I struggled a lot and got out and escaped out into the kitchen , Because I realised, in the end only I have to do all the work, and not my lazy bed.

I got into my daily households, switched off all my rest of the alarms, who help me to wake up in a tough morning , then once I was half done, I started waking up m lil girl, who is more upset , than me, to go to school. I tried to stay calm, and not to get irritated with her, as I remember even I was the same when I was a kid, ( even now) .

SO at last I escaped from the trap of morning blues , and I wish everyday, I win in such a way , its a tough war. 😉