my conflicts

The busy morning is the worst time of the day. Even though am up, the Facebook, WhatsApp and other idle activities make me slow down a little bit . I try to regain the momentum but at times am like “Oh !! am really tired , let me sit for a while” . And finally, when it is about time, I run like a super fast machine.At times I think and I check whether I have got some extra hands working behind me ,like the advertisement on TV where mum has multiple hands and she cooks multiple things ready and right on time.

Technology drives me slow and my inner-self requests me to sit and relax and enjoy and on the other and, the other side ,tells me finish the work and then enjoy. Every morning is a conflict between these two halves and is always busy satisfying both the needs. That is when I really wish it a holiday.

The good feeling of having a cleaned house, and clean kids is heavenly, but where do I gather energy to enjoy after all these works. At times I really wish I was some fairy who could bring in some magic. Be present where we have without hustles and bustles and get things ready without any hard work . Maybe that is not fun , that is why we are left to do marathons.

These conflicts will never end , either this or something else it will be.

By the end of the day, even when my eyes are heavy too, I gaze on my mobile screen trying to chat with friends and at times it will be a disaster, because I cannot see what am typing . 😉

So fun thing never comes up when we need, for me fun comes after all my hard day is gone ,when am exactly off to sleep wit my darling cuddling near me.

Spreading smiles :)

As I pass by someone , I make sure I smile than giving a grumpy face. I feel that is really an awkward thing to do. I remember the day when I was working , the only thing I could see around me was , people like a robot walking having a headphone in their ears and completely disconnected from the world . I too became a part of it, as I felt I was kind of befitting with them , I changed myself. There were no smiles no hi no hello. So awkward I used to feel.

It was the time when I was right out of college , where even if we don’t know anyone , we would start making a small talk make everything comfortable. I hated work at times then. The boredom and the monotonous life there made me more like a stone which was getting blended with that busy world. I hated myself then.

Now being out of it , am happy. My lips smile and my eyes widen up when I see people, its like am able to get back to understanding the better world now, than only computers and scripts, and work. This is far better to be in my own world.

It is easy to make my day, just a smile a gesture that shows that am alive and happy is enough.A smile never comes easily, especially when we are upset or caught in thoughts , but I wish I could bring in more smiles and happiness toe everyone around me.

My kids bring the smile in me and that what makes me happier. The moment I see them wake up, sleep, getting ready for school, doing naughty things, returning from school etc. just brings a smile on my face.

It’s is too easy for kids to bring out the happy you very fast. The best thing about being a mum is you smile and cry without any reasons and it is relaxing.

Recollecting my good old days

With a cup of tea, and the fresh morning where I see school buses lined up in front of my apartment windows and kids walking up to the schools , reminds me of those days of my life where I used to tag behind my mum to school. I guess for everyone other than the studies part, the school was refreshing. The friends , the fun , the free period’s everything was good about the school.

Now we all are burdened with the responsibilities that even fun, in the same way, seems to take our mind off the fun. Now even we are having fun with friends and families, our mind takes a roller coaster ride deep inside ,remind of the chores we have to do and the responsibilities we have.

As I could see the kids playing around having fun , I really wish I could be a child again and forget all my worries. I wanted to play around and enjoy my day , and then finally lie down near my mum and give a tough time to her ears reciting my whole day activities, which often I do. Enjoy the time with my dad, as he used to listen to all my chattering with lots of patience almost 2-3 times a day.

I want to be back to school, enjoy my small talks, my classroom where I had my friends surrounding and talking . Maybe it was the best time, I had my mind free from all worries. The days were not tiring ,and we could refresh even with a smile.

Schools are the best time of your age, because as you grow up, there are a lot more to come on the way. The strange part is , we may not know that we had the best time then, but only when we have lot many problems to deal with in the latter life .