Mommy musings · Musing and Thoughts · WFH MOM struggles

Stop mocking your child

Off late, whenever we were into a conversation in public, I realised i was accidentally and moreover unknowingly making fun of my own child. But my intentions were never to make her feel little. I was actually enjoying every bit of her, but i felt i was miscommunicating the same to the people around me and my own child.

I may not be perfect .. but I learn from my mistakes. I realised that the more I mock my child, the more she will lose her confidence upon her self.

Being growing up among people who hardly recognized me, I realised that doing the same thing to my child in a different manner is going to ruin her.

What if she talks loudly in public- she is expressing her opinion loud and clear and I must make her understand it – not about being loud but what she asked for. At times, we need to be loud and clear.

What if she is angry – the more i suppress her anger, she will forget to get angry when required. I realised maybe i should give a better perspective on being angry and it is not harmful.

What if she dances around while walking – Maybe it’s her way of joy.. and the people around me have forgotten how to enjoy amidst these busy schedules.

What if she cries – Shhh!! good girls don’t cry – Is it right?  If that’s the definition of crying i don’t want to be a good girl. Venting emotions is always good, it will not be built up or stimulate an explosion inside our heart and cause depression. Crying is truly an ideal way to relax.

I realised that she is allowed to vent out and express – where else she can do this if i don’t give her the option to do it. As a mother, all my methods of parenting should reflect to help my kids grow up into a confident person. And also she should realise, as a mother- i will be her eternal support – and she can always confide to me.

As parents, we all should ultimately build and boost their confidence and assure them in what they do. Yes, of course, wrongdoing must be noticed and advised not to. But when you bring them up with confidence as well as trust in them, and their caliber.. nothing can go wrong.

Let us stick to these :

  1. Appreciate them, no matter small thing they do- little things does matter.
  2. Encourage them in what they are passionate about.
  3. Don’t just step in for everything, let them find their own way out.
  4. Let them be, what they should be doing in their age- don’t ask them to a matured teenager, when they are still a kid who needs to enjoy,
  5. Let them be curious.
  6. Stop short cuts, let them learn the tough way.
  7. No criticizing for good performance. It just breaks them to see, that their parents hardly appreciate them. Be it a small achievement or big, ensure you tap on their back- because they have been good.
  8. Make them realise, that mistakes are an integral part of learning. You don’t learn to walk, without falling down.
  9. Teach them, if they don’t know and help them understand. Rome was not built in a day.
  10. Never worry them, that you are worried- ensure you are showing you are confident about what they do – even though our brittle parenting mind is always worrying.
  11. Never let them escape from reality even if it is hard to accept. Life is not always a merry-go-round.

At least, following some of these, will guide you to help your child grow confident. And yes, remember- everything is a process- be it slow or fast – it is progress.

 

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