It is quite a natural feeling.. and you are allowed to hate. Actually, if i put it rightly, we all love to hate.
It is found that hatred is the fieriest feeling, that is actually something easy to frame upon someone. Something where we don’t want to explain further, we term it as ‘hate’, something we find the core problem we term them as ‘hate’, something, we cannot distinguish – we term them as ‘hate’.
It is quite common that we use ‘hate’ at various instances, sometimes unknowingly.
I realized lately, that I began to term ‘hate’ for things, I know I don’t fit in or something I cannot even want myself to be – maybe my lack of confidence in it – not exactly maybe.. but yes, it is the core reason. That is when I began to work anti-hate towards the things I felt i hated. It is like, I began to befriend that emotion and the feelings turned right.
So hate is just the aggressiveness when we turn it into compassion…things work out fine. Again it is not easy, but it takes time.
so Why do we hate? –
The Feeling of – ‘The Others’ – We all grow in certain communities, we are brought up in such a way, that we are taught always that we are right and the ‘others’ are not. So we tend not to follow the footsteps of the ‘other’ forbidden group and be concealed into our own group. Automatically, this fear becomes the reason for hatred. Most of the community wars are triggered by this baseless thought. If we turn this aggression into compassion and think there is no competition or harm to come, that’s when things show a bright side.
Being Us – We all have something, about ourselves that we hate the most. Sometimes we project that though on to a person or a thing, which can be some way related to correlated to this negative side of us. The more we see it or the person, we begin to hate them more. But ultimately, these thoughts are derived from others, who tell us that’ these traits” are bad or sin. (when we actually don’t know what is wrong and what is right- it is all a perspective ) . We are scared of being rejected by our loved ones, and we tend to repress all these emotions and sometimes it turns to be hatred for someone. Even it coins up hatred to all those people, who forced you to suppress those emotions because they termed it to be bad.
Love yourself – However we are, love thy self. It is important to love oneself, the more we develop that compassion toward oneself, we slowly disagree to hate. It is important to accept ourselves as what we are, then slowly we stop to hate others too. The secret behind this is that we slowly comes to understand that one’s behavior is as a result of what they are, hence we do not feel anger, but we become more and more humane.
In short, hate just fills a void in us – like the void created by feelings like helplessness, shame, injustice, powerlessness, or lack of somethings, etc. Like for example, people tend to get angry, when they are in pain. Hence hate is like a temporary release from the suffering in the innermost.
So What can be done?
It is simple, we develop the feeling of compassion for ourselves, the others, and then slowly we will be able to eliminate the hatred.