Tag Archives: fingers

Fiddling with her dreams

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She decided to remain silent, quite impossible for her, though.

She felt like the moment she seems to decided silence, there was a battle going on in her mind, trying to convince that silence was never an answer. At times the words need to be out and left to be heard by others, else the conflicting words in the heart will remain there in total chaos. Silence kills her thoughts which are the catalysts of her emotions. The thought makes what she is now – convinced, confirmed and dedicated.

She silenced her decisions once she was determined to achieve.

She silenced her dreams, as it cannot be achieved.

She silenced her heart, as it was broken many times.

She silenced her feet, responsibilities, not to disturb other’s sleep.
She silenced herself to avoid being self-pitied.

At times the silence killed her soul, she was never what she wanted to be.

Overshadowed by the decisions of, fiddling in responsibilities, flying like new born bird who is trying to reach a branch while its initial flight.

Scared, lost, confused and hurt.

Yet she found the freedom of speech, a way to propagate her thoughts to reach the thousands who felt like her. Even though her lips never spoke, her voice was never head, her fingers moved and her words flew out into the blank pages.

She found the way to say and not to say. She was never silenced in her thoughts. Her thoughts were free and all she did was enjoyed the new found freedom of expression. To express or not to express was a choice, and to read and not to be read was another choice which she fought on her own.

As she lay there

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As she lay there gazing at the beautiful spotless blue sky. All she could feel was the wetness of the green grass holding her firmly to the ground. The grass was wet and smelling like earthly things. She could feel the softness of the leaves and the wetness of the sand with her fingers. She lied there gazing the beauty up there and feeling the nature with her fingers down there. She was so close to the ground that she could see small ants walking by her side carrying things. She felt like her eyes were some magnifying glass. She wished to go with these hardworking ants and see their kingdom. Some wishes are better to be wished and not fulfilled.

As she looked up, simultaneously three four jets were cutting across their path in the sky, making some patterns in the sky. It was like someone drew white lines on the dark blue board on the wall. The smoky path created up there was dissipating gradually, soaking into the blue sky slowly and becoming invisible. 

She was playing with the grass, whose leaves were thinner than her fingers, she slowly rubs the leaves, feeling the coldness of dew drops. She felt like she landed on a lovely spring.Her bare feet was feeling the grass beneath. She felt that all her nerves ending in the bottom of her feet were enjoying the thrust of the grass. It was like some reiki treatment. 

She closed her eyes, trying to feel which nerves of her feet were getting pampered. She felt like the whole earth was cuddling her, feeling her and slowly crawling up onto her, taking every inch of her body under their control. The grass was covering her legs hands and moving to her belly button as if to nailing herself down to the mother earth. 

She lay still, feeling the creeping of the lovely hands of the earth.She lay there with her eyes closed and feeling the touch.And slowly and slowly, the creeping went on, tickling her as it passes by every spot on her body to reach her belly button.

AHHHHHHHH !!! NO NO NO!!!!!!!LET Me Get up 

She giggled and woke up from her dreams, it was not mother nature, but her Lil kids, who were crawling on to her, and tickling her all the time. She cuddled them, hugged them, tickled them and they all hee-haw together happily.

She knew this was her happy world.